Despite what the magazine aisle says, it’s natural for women to experience low libido (aka our sexual desire). It ebbs and flows like our desire for dark chocolate but with more confusion. Unfortunately, there’s no such thing as a cookie-cutter solution for women as there is for men. Science hasn’t yet figured out how to increase libido in women, so we’re left feeling broken without a little blue (or pink) pill to fix it.
Life can be super stressful or dandy and sex takes a backseat. But when you’re looking for a lift in libido often, you’ll be wondering if it’s rocket science after all.
Your Biggest Sex Organ
Contrary to media messaging, libido is not found in your lingerie or a musky cologne. Our sexual desires formulate in our brains, although it’s our bodies that reap the rewards. That means a lot can affect our sex drive.
Most women will experience stretches of “libido lows” for seasons. A few causes include:
- Medications, including birth control pills
- Hormones/thyroid issues
Your plummet in arousal could be due to something mental or emotional, like the ongoing pandemic panic or workplace woes. When your mind is preoccupied with worry, it can be difficult to get distracted, even for something special.
Emily Nagoski, Ph.D. teaches sex drive is more like the relationship between an accelerator and brakes. Everyone has a different sensitivity to each. So, someone with an average accelerator and a high brake may experience low libido. The “brake” is slammed from turn-offs. And as all teens know, you can’t go anywhere with the brake on. You can download Emily’s sexual temperament worksheets here.
Address the Stress
Life will not ever be 100% stress-free, but self-care can help restore the better balance. An increase in libido will come more naturally when you can feel confident and calm. You may find that when you can make personal intimacy part of your routine, your libido will naturally increase.
Sex therapy is a wonderful resource to work through past traumas or narratives that are inhibiting your sex life. Talking through your issues with an unbiased professional allows you to break them down and tackle each concern with purpose and a plan. Sex therapy helps many individuals and couples break past the rut of a parked sex life.
Know Your Pleasure Points
Each woman has her own way of experiencing or showing pleasure. What works for your friend may not work for you. Spend some time exploring your body, with or without a partner. Take your time, try new things, and keep tabs on what wows you.
Use this information to make your next session even more sensual, and share your findings with your partner when you’re intimate. We promise they’ll like it. Self-exploration and shameless play can help boost that accelerator and turn things up a notch.
Know Your Turn-offs
You can have every sexy intention in the world, but if that brake is on, you won’t get there. People with a higher bake sensitivity may have more (and more random) things that keep them turned off. For example, your brain may be thinking about the dirty dishes, the work presentation due tomorrow, or a salty text from your BFF earlier. Identify what turns you off and focus on eliminating, or at least compartmentalizing, those issues.
How CBD Can Help Boost Desire
CBD is like Cupid’s “love potion,” with benefits that are bedroom-friendly. People use CBD to address a variety of symptoms, from chronic pain to mild depression and low libido. Libido enhancement is another of CBD’s many perks, allowing the user to decompress and delight in their deepest desires. CBD is shown to reduce performance anxiety related to sex, increase confidence, and even boost all the feels (aka orgasm).
House of Wise SEX line
House Of Wise’s SEX gummies offer full-spectrum, hemp-derived CBD with naturally occurring ingredients to help stimulate desire and calm. The ingredients we love for a better turn-on include:
- Horny Goat Weed: Contains icariin, which can increase blood flow to all the right areas while promoting increased energy and stamina.
- Maca Root: Contains high levels of iron and iodine to promote healthy cells and to help keep your metabolism on track. Its potassium helps digestion and muscular function. Maca is also rich in calcium, amino acids, vitamins, and minerals. It's been reported to promote sexual desire and energy.
- Ashwagandha: Can help promote a sense of calm and support focus and concentration.
These turn-on ingredients are all packed in a delicious and flirty Wildberry flavor you’ll look forward to taking as a treat. Here’s how one of our Wise Women worded her wild experience on a Twitter thread.
Healthy Precedes Horny
You may not have seen this equation on your SATs, but good overall health is a precursor to pleasure. A well-balanced diet, adequate sleep, plenty of hydration, regular exercise, and so on will make you look and feel your best. When you are at the top of your game, or at least getting there, you will find that your accelerator is more sensitive.
Of course, you don’t have to be a “horn ball” to want a healthy sex life and an increase in libido to make it happen. But when you welcome a harmonious well-being, you may notice a nice shift towards desire.
Routine Is Queen
The biggest tip? Focus on YOU and your healthy routines. Take care of yourself in overall wellness, especially during a pandemic. Your health is everything, so setting up good habits now can ensure success for the long-term. Sex will feel a lot better when you are in good shape and of sound mind.
On a related note, you may be experiencing depression or another type of mental/emotional issue. Perhaps a medication you’re on is contributing to your low libido. Talk with your doctor about how to increase libido in women with this subject in mind.
Society wonders how to increase libido in women without understanding the difference, and science, behind it all. There is no “right” sex drive. Our desire isn’t to be managed by anyone but ourselves. What’s most important is that your wants and needs match what is actually happening.
Shop House of Wise SEX line to help boost your accelerator and take back control of your libido.